The more we are concerned about the happiness of others, the more we are building our own happiness at the same time. Never consider yourself to be superior to those you are helping. Whether you give them your money, your time or your energy, always act with humility even if the other person is dirty, shifty, stupid, or clothed in rags.
There are several ways of being happy, Some people base their happiness on the possession of material goods and the satisfaction of the senses. This is a fragile happiness. Even when you think you are really happy, if you take that happiness for granted you will doubly suffer when circumstances are no longer in your favour. Others believe that their happiness is due to moral attitudes and behaviour. This is the kind of happiness we need, because it is based on profound causes and does not depend on circumstances. If your attitude is not right, then even if you are surrounded by good friends and the best facilities, you cannot be happy. This is why mental attitude is more important than external conditions.
The world can appear as friend or foe, full of defects or full of qualities: it all depends on your mind. Generally, there is nothing that has only advantages or only disadvantages. Everything we use - food, clothes, buildings and so on - and all the people we live with - family, friends, superiors, inferiors, masters, disciples, and so forth - have both qualities and defects. That is how it is. In order to judge reality correctly, we must acknowledge the good and bad sides for what they are. From a certain point of view, we can see everything in a positive light. Even suffering can be considered beneficial. Those who have been through a lot of hardship do not generally complain at small difficulties. The hardships they have experienced have forged their temperament and given them a broader perspective, a more stable mind, one that is closer to reality and more capable of seeing things as they are.
Try to discern clearly between the person and his or her attitude in the moment. Do not react against the person but against the emotion or mode of behaviour. Reject any wish to harm the person himself. Try to help him change and benefit him as much as possible. If you restrict yourself to trying to put a stop to his actions, there is a chance that he will cease quickly from acting as your enemy. He may even become your friend.
Love is the ultimate way to transform people, even when they are full of anger and hatred. If you express love continually and steadily, without ever tiring, you will touch them. This takes a lot of time. One needs tremendous patience. But if your intentions are perfectly pure and if your love and compassion are steady, you will succeed.
Dalai Lama
'Daily Advice from the Heart'
Salam,
Cherine
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